Was up for a few hours friday night with my grandson so when I got up at 7 I was quite hungry.
Usually I would have a coffee then and not eat till 10 or 11 but I had some fruit, nuts and seeds mashed up, it was delicious. Then I made 2 pints of juice to drink throughout the day, I am upping the amount of juice I am having to blast my energy up.
I am feeling inspired and confident about not really knowing what I am going to do next.
I fancy getting a nice place in Gozo and running a really cool health and fitness air bnb.
Or I could go back for a few months then head off round the world, oh the options are open.
But for some reason I was still "looking" for something to eat to satisfy whatever it is I seem to need to satisfy!
It's like that time of the month, maybe my body is still going through that cycle.
Like you do not ever get full no matter what you do. For someone who fasted for 10 days I know that this is all BS, there is some emotional stuff behind it, maybe hormones too but I need to release all of these thoughts, however in that moment it feels real.
Enter Nicky and Steesh with a fish supper that is way to big for Joni. I had a bit of fish and sneaked a few chips too.
Then did the usual thing you do when you eat something unhealthy, especially something that was fried in a chippy, you regret it, thinking about how rancid the frying fat would be, how many time its been reheated and what is it anyway.
I knew they were coming with it so I should have eaten first, then it would have been easier.
Now what is crazy about all of this is the mind. I never once in the last 4 weeks thought about fish and chips.
I have thought about coffee, been around it quite a few times and never succumbed and I wont.
But there I was sneaking a few chips with the bit of delicious white fried fish.
Frying is no big deal if saturated fat is used, but is rarely is. Reheated trans fats are carcinogenic and should be 100% avoided, but I ate them none the less. A cup of organic coffee would have been a much better idea, but in that moment, at that time I wanted the tottie and the grease.
I have always loved potatoes in every shape and form. Even before I became so aware of nutrition I rarely ate sugar, chocolate and sweets, my treat was tatties. Crisp, chips, roasties and mashed or any other way you can get them.
Garlic, cream, onions baked in the oven.
They do not work for blood group O, we do not digest them well, but we were raised on them, like a lot of Brits.
We had them with every dinner, every night and sometimes twice in potato soup made with a ham hough.....delicious.
So I have some emotional attachments to them. Now its clear I can release it!
Food cravings can be caused my lack of nutrients. That was not what this was about. It was about the treat thing again.
It was the weekend, I was a bit tired (that can make you revert to old patterns) and because alcohol is out too there was some desire to recognise the fact it was the weekend with some treat. But weekends are not actually real either. Again it is just another concept of the modern world. In nature it is just another day. In our modern world it is the time when we do things we dont or cant do through the week.
More concepts that we live through without really knowing it.
Last night I stayed at Balinakill Country House.
I always sleep like a baby here. I slept sound all the way through till 8.30, very unusual for me. Woke up with the sun streaming in my face. I like no curtains and waking by natural light, especially with no artificial street lighting around.
I feel alive, excited and very lucky to be here, looking out at Nature, listening to the stream, watching the birds, this is the stuff I need and love now.
Although my friend tries to entice me with wine and lasagne, I stay true to my pledge acknowledging the chips on the way, that I am healing. I feel it today, the process is slower than I had hoped, but its happening and as the energy from the sun hits my lap top I laugh again at my impatience and doubt that perhaps I could make all these changes and nothing was going to change!
Again very good experience for me to help my clients heal.
Patience and faith.
Trust and surrender.
Whatever you want to call it, its the same deal.
Allow and accept the healing is happening. Release on all doubt, release from others points of view and well meaning advice, stay true, stay focussed, stay in faith.
Happy dayz, here is to your health and happiness.
Here is to me letting go of all my crazy mind talk and idea of "treats".
I am letting go of all limiting beliefs around potatoes.
I allow myself to eat only foods and drinks that act like medicine to my body.
I am healing.
I am vibrant, healthy and focussed.
Even although I believe I need a treat or crap food, I deeply and completely love, trust and accept mycellf.
Gratitude is a high vibration and I am feeling a ton of it sitting here looking out from the majestic, special, beautiful place.